Alone Again
by BrownSugarC
Summary: Twenty years later the paths of Sonja Percy and Christopher LaSalle cross again. The narrative of their lives unfolds before us with great regret and much to the dismay of them both.
1. Alone - Chapter 1 The Chance Encounter

Chapter 1 – The Chance Encounter

Cancelled? My flight is cancelled? That is what the board was telling me. I guess it was really no big deal. It didn't matter if I was stuck here in the Atlanta Airport since there's no one waiting for me in Alabama.

Once I got to the ticket counter I was informed that the Dothan Airport was socked in with fog. Equipped with my new boarding pass for tomorrow and information for my motel, I turned to walk down the corridor to the front of the Airport.

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught sight of a petite African American woman dressed to the nines. It had been a long time since I had thought about Sonja Percy but this woman had the same determined strut that I had witnessed when I worked with her in New Orleans.

I stepped up my gait with the intent to pass her up and look back. I was still running two miles a day even after being aged retired from NCIS last year allowing me to quickly overcome her.

I passed her then stopped dead in my tracks. The woman was engrossed in her device and would have ran right into me had I not called out her name.

"Sonja Percy?" She looked up and I could see the disbelief in her eyes.

"LaSalle? Oh my goodness" she said as she ran into my awaiting arms. "Chris it's been almost 20 years. How are you? What are you doing here?"

I'm flying home from a fishing trip in Montana. And you?

I am attending a two day recruiting outreach at the Atlanta University Center tomorrow. I still need to find a hotel and collect my materials.

Look, not to be forward or anything, but the airline gave me a hotel voucher. Why don't we see if we can get a two bedroom suite and then we can stay up and talk as long as we want to and be comfortable?

We walked down to the car rental desk and secured Percy's rental vehicle. We could see sings to the baggage claim from the rental desk and after retrieving her weapon moved over to collect her baggage and the packing crates of her materials.

We were indeed able to get a suite and with Sonja's government rate, didn't have to pay anything extra.

Once in the suite, I unpacked my clothes for the next day and found a fresh shirt to put on.

I was sitting in the parlor reading the newspaper when Sonja reappeared. "I don't know about you Percy, but I'm starved. Why don't we order in? There should be a menu around here somewhere."

Dinner orders completed we picked up the conversation where we left off at in the car.

It was about 11:00 when we decided that Percy needed to catch a few hours sleep to be ready for her activity tomorrow. "Let's have breakfast here and you drop me back over to the airport on your way to your event."

"That sounds like a plan" Sonja responds with a smile.

I barely slept. What was the chance that I would see her again after all these years? I can still remember hugging her in New Orleans the day she left. I wanted to pull her even closer to me. I wanted to kiss her and tell what a fool I had been and beg her to stay at least for a little while longer to see what we might be able to create.

I was up before the alarm went off. I had to take great care not cut myself shaving as I prepared to have breakfast with her. The first thing she mentioned that morning was how she had missed my smile. I could feel myself grinning like an eight year old school boy.

I hardly ate with all the butterflies in my stomach. Sonja drove me back over to the airport and walked me to my gate. Since she was still carrying a badge she was able to walk with me thru the final security check point. We talked the entire time and I ended up being the last passenger to board.

Sonja promised to call me when she got back to D.C. as I hugged her tightly and then breeched the threshold of the aircraft to find my seat.


	2. Alone Chapter 2 Revisiting My Heartbreak

Chapter – 2 Revisiting My Heartbreak

I couldn't believe seeing him again. Where had the time gone? He has aged gracefully and still had that killer smile. I can't believe that he never married. Shit, neither did I and I know in my own heart and mind that it was because of Christopher LaSalle.

This may not have been the smartest thing that I ever did but I enjoyed talking and laughing with him again. For years I had to protect my heart from falling for any man. Then one day I did only years later to find out that Ramon betrayed me.

I learned who just Chris LaSalle was shortly after I met him. A skirt chaser and one of the finest officers at the NOPD. He became my partner and later my friend and much later my crush.

Slowly he found a way into my heart. I wanted to hug him so bad when his mermaid died. He seemed so lost but I barely knew him then. In spite of that I could feel his pain. I had lost a close team member just a few years before that. I realized when you loved someone regardless if it was a friend or that special someone, that the pain can be enormous.

It wasn't until later that I realized that there were times that he seemed to keep me at arm's length. Then he got even sneaker. Rolling up on him and Melody took me to edge of extreme jealousy. There was never any indication that he was outwardly interest in me but when I walked into that situation I was hurt and I was angry. Knowing that the team all kept that secret from me made mad at all of them.

Even after the Tucker thing there were other women. I tried to ignore overhearing the phone calls. Some days he was just blatant about it like one murder investigation when one of the tarts was right on the scene of the crime grinning at him. Other days he appeared at work in the same clothes as the day before.

Tammy tried to help being encouraging but she was unaware that Chris has slammed shut the door on any possible relationship between the two us the week that Pride's bar had burned down. I was angry and hurt. Did I not see what I thought I saw? The hug, the tugboat incident and when he saved me from being pushed off that roof top? It all got to me and I knew for the longest time that it was time to move on. I got tired of staying in the condo drinking myself to sleep. It didn't help that Pride got sloppy with our lives. And then the warning from Jake kind of cemented the idea to move on.

Chris tried not to badger me when he found out that I was considering a different position with the feds. He walked around like a lost puppy dog for days. When I finally did come back, he acted like it was no big deal. Not mad huh? I wanted him to take me in his arms that last day and beg me not to go. He remained tight lipped with that same terseness that he displayed when Savannah died. I took it as a sign that nothing was going to move him off his decision so I felt free to go.

While I was busy settling in to D.C., my mind would often drift back to New Orleans. I had spent several years undercover there and made many friends. Merrie and Tammy became the sisters that I always wanted and Ms. Loretta the example that I always needed. I found myself missing them all even the nerdy one and no one more than Christopher LaSalle.

My first three years were busy with training and missions. I didn't have time to bar hop or indulge in the arts. Every once in a while I would run into another person with that definitive Alabama drawl which immediately caught my attention. I did follow college football and saw how well Alabama was doing. I thought back to Chris knowing that his buttons were busting and how much he must have wanted to be on the sidelines once again as the Alabama mascot.

I couldn't believe it when I got my five year pin. Where had the time gone? I looked in the mirror and spotted a grey hair. Wait a minute, I just turned 35 where did this come from? It was then that I took stock of my biological clock. Another five years and the ability to have a child would really to start to wane. I decided to freeze some eggs just in case. I still don't know how I let my sister convince me to do that.

The staff threw me a surprise 40th birthday party in the office. I was not happy about being forty and still single. It was my own fault for being so picky. After that every year just made it more difficult. I was set in my ways, only had a few more years on my mortgage and had been given more and more responsibility with the 'firm'.


	3. Alone Chapter 3 - What Ifs

Chapter 3 – What Ifs

I was unsettled the entire flight back to Dothan. I had a lot of time to think how I screwed this up many years ago. No woman I ever met made me feel both safe and comfortable like Sonja Percy. She was the best partner I ever had plus she was beautiful, smart and witty. While I trusted my many other team mates with my life, she and King were the only ones who ever synched with me. I still remember some of the many sweeps that we would do. It was like she knew what I was going to do before I did. We engaged in double speak which sometimes even made me uneasy.

Nope this isn't right. I screwed it up once but I will not be repeating that mistake I decided as I was walking toward my truck. I turned around and walked back to the airline desk and got a return ticket to Atlanta. I drove home to repack my suitcase and lay down to catch a few hours sleep before heading back to the airport.

Since she didn't have to pay for her lodging the first night, Sonja had chosen just to keep the suite and not need to repack her items. The motel was less than ten minutes from the airport. I knew where the career fair was being held and left my bag at the same motel.

I knew this was the right thing to do. I started to remember some of the women that I dated after Sonja left. It took a year for me to do a second date with any one of them. I always managed to find something wrong with each of them. Being so close to Tammy didn't help either. I knew that she secretly wished that I would have gone after Sonja then, but I ignored her hints and began to quickly change the subject when she mentioned she had spoken with her.

It was difficult though when I picked up one of her old cases and read through the notes with her handwriting often in the margins. Hannah seemed a little too interested in who Sonja was and why she left for my comfort. Then there were officers from NOPD who would quiz me on my former partner's whereabouts seeming a little put out that I hadn't kept up with her. Quite frankly they would never understand that I found it all quite painful. It was clear to me that I had screwed up and in spite of Triple P telling me that I did the right thing in letting her find her way, the pain had remained.

Ms. Loretta made comments about my apparent grief several times and finally confronted me. Later she sent me a printout about the seven stages of grief and encouraged me to seek out a friend of hers that I could consult with off the books. "Look Christopher, I went through this with Pride and Merrie. I am not going to lose you to this issue too. Please go see Dr. Payne."

Four sessions later even I could see the happiness in my life returning. There was a lot of pain there with Savannah's murder and my interaction with my father. I also resented how he left my mother and us kids alone and then actually abandoned Cade. Cade was another big issue. I had always regretted that I did not find him earlier when he went off the grid thinking it might have gone better for him.

Once I had dealt with them, I could focus on why I initially sought his help – Sonja Percy. I was able to convince myself that she was another nice woman in my life while pushing aside the truth that she meant as much to me as Savannah. In fact had I been honest with myself, I would have realized that she was my indeed my 'perfect match' just as Tammy had described her to me. So since I would not face up to the truth, I extended the time in my self-induced turmoil.

The months turned into years. Momma continued to hint at the fact that she wanted a grandchild. "I haven't met the right woman yet momma" I responded. Time passed by and suddenly I realized that my forty fifth birthday was approaching and I was seeing women on a hit and miss basis.

In the meantime King decided to retire and recommended me to replace him. I was temporarily reassigned to the Marine Corps West Field Office located in northern San Diego County to work with another senior agent allowing me to be exposed to different techniques, experiences and interactions with community leaders. There was more than one day that I sat at my new surroundings realizing that "I was not in Kansas anymore." I grew tired of the constant comments about my Alabama twang and offered to pay for a translator if that would end the comments.

King reminded me of why I was there and noted that I needed to learn how to deal with the pains in the butt. I would not realize until later how diplomatic the team leader had to be with politicians and other prominent people in the community. Fortunately I still had Tammy around to help me see the good in the people that the team interacted with. I did not have the intuitive skills to read people that King possessed. I still believed that those I interacted with were trying to pull a fast one on me.

Five years into my time as the lead agent Tammy decided that she wanted to transfer out. I couldn't fault her. I knew she missed the big city and New Orleans was not known as the most progressive place in America. During that time my own replacement and Sabastian had grown into the high quality officers that I needed to support the mission. Even with them, I still had focus on the new agent that was replacing Tammy.

The additional responsibilities did not leave much time for dating. Plus as I was getting older, the young pretty things became annoying. My job was dangerous, intense and my down time needed to focus on other things than skirt chasing. I had long learned that I either scared people because of my perceived power or encountered women who could not commit to a relationship with a cop.

I was surprised one day to have a guest walk in. It was Laurel Pride and her mother Linda. Laurel sat down to talk with Tammy as Linda beckoned me to the break area. "So how's it going Chris? I guess you are wondering why I am here?" Well it did seem odd to me. "I was talking to Duane the other day. He was concerned that you might be spending too much time at the office. I thought that odd because he obviously was not looking back at his own life."

"Chris I remember how difficult it was for me. Every time that Duane left our house I had feared that he would not return to us. There came a day where I couldn't take it anymore. I realized that it was time to end the marriage. I see that you are still alone. You may never meet a woman who can deal with this part of your life. I'm just being honest here. I just felt it necessary to tell you that now and perhaps knowing that can better help you to accept this void in your life.

A year, then another, then another passed by. The military district realigned and we saw more sailors and coast guard ships in port. The port of New Orleans expanded and with it came an uptick in crime. Days in the office turned into longer hours on duty as our caseload rose.


	4. Alone - Chapter 4 Confrontation

Chapter 4 – Confrontation

I was up and dressed before my alarm even went off. I went over what I was going to do and say when I came face to face with Sonja again. The flight back to Atlanta was uneventful and I was able to execute my auto lease with no problem. After a quick stop at the motel, the GPS quickly directed me to the University and the right facility.

I took a long, deep breath before I entered the building. It only took me a couple of minutes to find the FBI table. I waited until there was no one at her table and quickly walked over to it. "Hello again" I said shocking Percy. "LaSalle, what are you doing here?" I came around the table so that only she could hear my comments.

"Look Sonja. I let you run away from me once. I decided on my plane ride home that I wasn't going to let that happen again. I am hoping that you have left your evening open so we can talk a little bit."

Looking stunned she managed to murmur out an "okay."

"Why don't I come back at the closing time and help you pack up?"

"That sounds fine Chris."

Seven p.m. soon came and I made my way back to the Center. As we packed up the materials, I caught Sonja giving me side eye views like she wanted to say something but then deciding not to. After loading up her trunk, I followed her back to the hotel arriving just before the last rays of sunlight disappeared.

Sonja went in to catch a quick shower after giving me her dinner order. She was back in the room just a few minutes before the knock on the door from the steward. The room was filled with the fragrance of the soap on her skin just as I remembered from sitting in my truck on stake outs with her.

"So what just was so important LaSalle" she asked defiantly.

"I have never forgotten the day you left. Actually the weeks leading up to the fact that I knew you had the interview and were considering leaving. Even though it was so long ago, I still remember asking you if it was what you wanted to do. I thought there was more to say but we were interrupted by Triple P."

"Look, I know you are tired and have an early flight out tomorrow. I know you must be surprised by my returning to Atlanta. Why don't you let me come see you sometime in the next month or two? I haven't been to D. C. for some time and I never did make to the grave of one of my high school buddies who died right at the end of the Iraqi conflict. Maybe we can do some other tourist things in addition to going to Arlington and be able to relax and catch up and talk.

Sonja looked like she wanted to say no. I had seen that shoulder shrugged at least once before in the cemetery when we finally talked out why we could have a relationship. She sighed loudly before say "alright, you win. I will need to check my calendar. Here's my business card I wrote my personal e-mail address on the reverse. E-mail me and I will respond when I am looking at my calendar after I clean out my inbox the next couple of days."

I got up and offered her my hand as if she need help getting out of the chair. "Thank you Sonja" I said as I hugged her good night. "You can't know how much that I have missed you" Absolutely no way I thought to myself.

We ate breakfast together downstairs and I once again trailed her to the airport where we dropped off our rental cars.

We laughed and talked waiting for her flight to be called and hugged tightly again before she walked down the walkway. I sighed to myself thinking that went better that anyone could have thought. She could have just said no to me coming to D.C.

Oh my. This time I caught my own self grinning. This is the happiest that I have been in a long time. A very long time.


	5. Alone - Chapter 5 A Capitol View

**Chapter 5 – A Capitol View**

It had been years since I had been in D.C. I rarely drove in the metro and was glad that the academy was actually 35 miles outside of the city.

Of course the GPS system lead me right to Sonja's condo. After showing the concierge my ID, the attendant gave me an envelope which included a suite key and a pass card for the parking garage. The inside of the condo looked like a magazine photo layout. There were art pieces from all over the world that sat about or hung on the walls. The furniture looked all brand new. Spacious and sun filled the unit was welcoming and bright.

I must have dozed off while watching the TV. I was awakened when I heard Sonja open the back door. "So there you are" she exclaimed. "I welcome your presence to get me out of the building for a week. I've taught my next class so many times that I don't even need a training outline anymore."

"So is there anything special that you would like to see other than Arlington while you're here." I looked a little chicken but said it anyway "how about the other side of that door" pointing at the master bedroom. Sonja rolled her eyes and walked toward the kitchen. "What's your pleasure? I couldn't remember your favorite beer so I only picked up a couple of these." We can go shopping later.

"Yeah this will do" I replied taking a bottle from her..

"Hey I have a surprise for you! I got tickets to the football game on Sunday."

"How could I mind going to see the Falcons play" I asked?

"They belong to a guy I work with so we will be surrounded by several people that I know personally. It should be a good game."

I thought that you might want to go across the street to eat tonight. They have the best Iowa corn fed beef in this area. They also have a house band on the weekends that you might enjoy."

"The steak was even better than I expected. I noticed that Sonja still ate like a bird still weighing under a hundred pounds. We could hear the band just fine and even found the opportunity to make it to the dance floor a couple of times.

Walking back across the street I quickly found out why I did not like living in big cities. I almost got hit not paying attention to the speeding cars. Back in the condo, Percy put on a Bonnie Raitt play list. I was impressed that she remembered that she was one of my favorite artists. "Here" I said as I beckoned her to feet. Being back in the condo I could pull her even closer to me. I had forgotten the smell of her shampoo. She melted into my arms as I remembered the first time that we hugged. How could I remember that was a surprise to me.

"Sonja?"

"Yes."

"Can I kiss you?"

"You have to ask?"

"No, but you know me. The southern boy in me has never left" said as I extended my hand up to her chin. The kiss was as sweet as I could have imagined. We danced a little longer until Sonja said "look it's getting late and I'm a little tired. I went in early to get all my class materials ready before my vacation. We have a long day tomorrow so let's get some shut eye."

"Did you find the guest bedroom all right?" she asked.

"Yes" I say quietly

"Well, have a good sleep and I'll see in the morning."

I kissed her one more time and stood and watched her as she walked into her bedroom closing the door behind her. I realized that I was tired as well. I must have fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I peeked out the door as soon as I got up. It was quiet. When I came out of the shower, I smelled coffee and heard Percy singing. Her voice was still as strong and pretty as ever.

"I couldn't remember how you take your coffee" she says.

"One sugar will do" I responded.

"So I wasn't sure what else you might want to eat but I did pick up bacon and eggs. We can eat and be on our way and go to the grocery store in the morning. I thought that you might want to go down gym in the morning then we could stop at the grocery store on the way back."

As Sonja walked by me, I could smell the shampoo on her hair again. That conjured up some pleasant memories sitting in the car with her. Later with the dishes all washed we set out for the train station and made our way to Arlington. I had never lived in a city with a train system. The one in D.C. encompassed 116 miles. The long ride afforded me the time to sit close to her and talk the entire way to the train stop at the cemetery.

The next two days flew by. We both slept in on Tuesday. I finally had to remind myself why I had come and needed to be honest.

Straight forwardly I said "Sonja. I want to stay."

"What do you mean stay. I don't have to be back to the office until next Tuesday."

"I want to stay here with you. I don't know if you would agree to marry me, but would be satisfied if you just allow me to stay here a few months and see if we could build a permanent relationship."

I saw that look in her face that told me she was unhappy with those words. Sonja exploded angrier than I had ever seen her. "I should have realized this" she said. "I knew you had been too quiet yesterday. I just suspected that you were tired."

"You want to make this like a storybook story Chris? It's more like a nightmare" she said trying not to shout. "I haven't forgotten that you closed your heart to me and forced me to leave New Orleans. We could have put something together then and had a family together and a beautiful home life. Now you want back into my heart?"

""Shit Chris, it would be easy to tell you no but I realized when you walked up to the table in Atlanta that I still loved you. I resented you again for pushing me away. I was angry when I got back on the plane to come back here. You ruined my life and it appears that you ruined your own as well."

"Let me think about it" she said as she walked away trying to hold the tears back and slammed her bedroom door. Unbeknownst to me she went in, turned the shower on, got in and screamed as the water splashed around her.

I finally dried off and combed my hair out. It was quiet when I stepped back into the front room. Chris' bags were sitting by the door. "You're leaving" I asked when he finally came back into the room?

"Yes. I don't want to cause you anymore pain Sonja. I just wanted to see if we could build something now but I can see that I hurt you and that it is something that you will not be able to overcome."

"Don't you think that that should be my decision" she said softly? I looked look deeply into her face. "I realize that I never stopped loving you Christopher. I need to bury the past and you need to give me some time to do that. I think that I will be able to forgive you in time but it will be only then that I can move on."

We did all the tourist things the remaining days. I could feel the tension fade. While the make out sessions intensified, I never did make it through the door of the master bedroom.

Sonja flew down to Dothan two months later.

"All right Christopher" she said as we had coffee at the house. "Let's try this." With those words she walked over to me and reached up to kiss me. She went over and picked up her purse and handed me a box of my favored protection of days gone by. "Come on LaSalle, I'm way ahead of you."

Tuesday night Chris had to attend a City Council Meeting. Christopher texted me that he had left a package for me in the sunroom. I opened it to find his mother's engagement ring and a note saying 'Sonja, will you marry me?' The tears leaked from my eyes as I lifted my head toward the ceiling thinking 'all this time? All this time Christopher LaSalle?'

I knew that I only had to work six more months to qualify for my maximum retirement benefit. This seemed as good of a time as ever to leave the huge metropolis of the District. I had long grown weary of boarding aircraft to who knew where in world.

I laid down on Chris' bed and inadvertently dozed off. I heard my name "Sonja? Sonja can you hear me?" "Yes, I can hear you but let me tell you if you want me to sleep in this bed every night, you are going to have get a softer mattress." By then I was fully awake and Chris joined me in his bed. "Thank you Sonja. I want to make you the best husband in the world."

We decided that we would get married at Disney World of all places. It was after all the place where dreams come true. We visited with the wedding coordinator on video camera. She smirked as she looked at the old people on the other side of the screen. No honey I responded, we are not one of the 'my boyfriend's back' group I responded to her inquiry. It's a long story of life with a long intermission and now we are finally officially together.

Everyone still laughs at our wedding pictures with Minnie and Mickey Mouse. We had a fabulous time at the many parks.

MY decision to take terminal leave was wise. I realized that I didn't want to take one day away from my new husband.


	6. Alone - Chapter 6 Destiny

**Chapter 6 – Destiny**

The new house was finished a month before the wedding. Sonja's condo sold the first week on the market. Everything she shipped arrived totally intact. We had to pay a prime fee because of her collectables. I have to admit that I was amazed that everything fit but Sonja had the eye. The house was a little more rustic than Sonja wanted but she compromised on a number of things to allow me to be more comfortable. She made one bedroom into a study and filled it with more feminine styled furniture and window coverings.

Having traveled so many places abroad, Sonja was content to travel across North America. We spent time in the Rockies that first summer and then returned to the same place in January barely beating an incoming blizzard that kept us confined inside for two days. Sonja could snow ski and left me several times alone in the lodge. After the second time I threaten to find a 'snow bunny' to keep me company so she limited her time away on the slopes.

Having reconnected with Tammy we visited her in New York City. It was another place that Sonja was familiar with. We did the rounds at Broadway as well as the normal tourist traps.

One day while sitting on the Status Cruise to the Statue of Liberty, Sonja asked me about the smile plastered on my face. "It's there Sonja because I'm so happy. I can't believe that I found you again. I don't ever want to be parted from you again."

Balancing being married and doing what I always wanted to do was more difficult that I thought. I got a lot razzing from my fishing buddies about having to check in with my now wife before I made commitments. My second love of football fit in with Sonja's lifestyle but the billiard playing on Friday night became the first casualty of my new marriage.

I had left the backyard to Sonja but found in spite of not being able to make any decisions about what it would and did finally look like, my only contribution was manual labor. It really did end up nice. She and the builder worked hard to find a place on the hill where a pool could both fit and properly drain. I questioned her about putting a pool in but was proven wrong every time that Cade was able to come and spend a week end. He was either in the water or sitting under an umbrella lounging or sunning himself glad to be away from the constant observation of workers at the facility.

There was space for her garden which she put in the second spring with me. It had been a while since I had freshly harvested veggies. I loved carrots and broccoli. To be able to pick them, wash them off and just eat them was something that I hadn't done since I left home for New Orleans.

The chickens became more like pets to me. I would often notice one missing and Sonja feigned it must have flown off. I looked at her with great doubt knowing that chickens don't just fly off. At first I suspected a fox but I found out later that she was also selling poor laying hens off to the butcher.

Overall we settled into being Ma and Pa Kettle just fine minus the children.


	7. Alone - Chapter 7 Surprise, Surprise!

**Chapter 7 – Surprise, Surprise!**

It was nice having Sonja home with me literally every hour of the day. It was time for football to start up again. This would be my third season since we were married and I realized that Sonja was not taking my being away for so long in the evenings. I suggested that she come to the practices and run laps with me and the players at the end of our scheduled outs. That time eventually extended into coming into the gym and lifting weights. The players gathered around one day when I was spotting Sonja. My wife at 4' 11" was extremely impressive on the weights as one of the few individuals who could bench press their own weight.

A couple of days into the pre-season we were approached on the device by a freshman player. Since I worked with the varsity, I only knew his face. He asked for some pointers and Sonja coached him through the moves as I spotted him making sure everything remained safe. They made their own friendship and I noticed several days later that Malcom sought out Sonja to run his laps as well.

As the season wound down, the team began to plan for the awards banquet. I had reviewed the award nominations and noticed that Malcom had been selected by the coaches as "Mr. Hustle." A couple of days before the banquet Sonja crossed paths with him in the weight room. "So your parents must really be proud of you" Sonja told him. "I don't have parents Ma'am. I live in foster care. "Well they'll be coming right?" "I doubt it ma'am. They think football is waste of time." "Well", Sonja asked, "would you mind if I come as your 'parent'?" I bet I could get Coach LaSalle to sit with us as well". Sonja said his face lit up like a light bulb.

Sonja indeed sat with Malcom as a proud momma bear. She shocked him as he returned to his seat after receiving his award by hugging him and planting a kiss on his check. The poor boy turned beat red but I swore that I could see a tear come to his green eyes. Sonja continued to meet up with him in the weight room as the off season began. She invited him over for a Saturday college football game which became a regular habit. He ate with us at Thanksgiving allowing me to display some of my culinary prowess.

I won't say that my wife was sly, but having been a bachelor my entire life, I didn't quite catch on to the fact that I was being set up. Sonja had encouraged me to take Malcom with me on a fishing trip for an entire weekend. He seemed to blossom surrounded by my group of male friends who were more than willing to teach this young man everything they knew about fishing in one weekend.

He raved all the way back to the foster home about each of my friends. We had been invited to go to the ranch of one of the men to ride horses. Malcom stated that he had never seen a horse up close much less rode one. It was another great weekend.

Sonja somehow discovered that Malcom's 16th birthday was in a few weeks. She called the freshman football coach and found out the names of some of his friends. He was just stunned when he walked in to the house for a Saturday afternoon basketball game with me and was surprised by many of his team mates and his two closest friends from high school.

I looked up during the party and noticed that Malcom had disappeared somewhere. I walked the grounds and found him out of sight of the house. "What's wrong son? Why aren't you in there with the guys?"

"I just needed a minute coach. This is the first birthday party that I ever had. It was a lot to take in."

I pulled him close and let him cry his big man tears. "Thank you so much for caring about me." We walked back to the house side by side.

Malcom caught a ride back to his foster home with one of the other players while I helped Sonja clean up. "That was wrong of you 'City Mouse'."

"What? What are you talking about Chris?"

"Sonja did you know that that boy had never had a birthday party before?"

"No honey, I had no clue. He doesn't talk a lot about his personal life so I have just kind of shied away from personal stuff."

"So why was it wrong?"

"Because it broke my heart to have him cry on my shoulder with gratitude."

I made an appointment to meet with the boy's advisor at the high school the following Monday. He was able to tell me a little more about Malcom and then gave me the contact information of his foster family. I went to see them one Saturday afternoon when I knew that Sonja and Malcom were attending a school science fair.

It seemed that Malcom's mother abused him as a young child. He had been in foster care for 13 years. This was his fifth foster home in all that time. I could look around and could see that the house was clean and the Johnsons seem like nice people. I finally broached the subject about him being adopted by them. Oh no, Coach LaSalle. We could never adopt a black child. I tried to keep a disciplined look on my face even though I was struggling.

I could smell dinner as I walked back into the house. I heard Malcom yelling at the players on the TV screen. We had a great dinner as Malcom ate like he always did – like a starved child. He was bigger than some professional football players. Sonja drove him back his house while I washed the dishes.

"You were awfully quiet at dinner Country Mouse." Sonja says when she returned and sat down beside me on the sofa.

"I had a lot on my mind."

"Like what?"

I filled her in on my activities of the past few days. "Look Sonja. We got into this marriage late in life. Even if we had wanted to have a child, we wouldn't have wanted to have had an infant. While you may think that you have been 'slick' about it, you have done everything in your power to bring Malcom close to my heart. I want to tell you that have succeeded. So what would you think if we had Malcom come live with us?"

"Well, Chris isn't it kind of hard to get a foster care license?"

"Sonja, no honey. Not as a foster child but as our son. We have plenty of room here and plenty of love to help him grow into a fine man. Cade already asks about his 'nephew' when he calls."

"Oh Chris" she says as she rushes into my arms. "So where do we start?"

"How about I call Rachael on Monday and see what we need to do."

Rachael referred me to a lawyer who specialized in private adoptions. Because Malcom was a ward of the court, it was explained to me that the petition could move quicker.

We had arranged for Malcom to be with us for another Saturday afternoon basketball game.

"You know Malcom that Miss Sonja and I married late in life. I had a lot of challenges with my father as a kid and actually even after I grew up. I knew Sonja back then and she helped me through some of that pain. For years I volunteered at a hospital in New Orleans visiting sick children. I would walk away each Saturday overwhelmed with their suffering and the pain that I saw in their parents. I knew then that I always wanted a son of my own. But, but…" at that I started to choke up and realized that my throat was closing up.

"What coach is trying to say Malcom" Sonja jumped in. "We think a lot of you and we would like for you to consider allowing us to adopt you as our son."

I'm not sure who cried more – me or Malcom. He was just stunned.

"Oh yes" he was finally able to say. So what happens now?" He asked.

"Well we have to have what they call a 'home study' completed. Fortunately for us both Sonja and I have recent FBI background checks so we are cleared on that front as far being investigated and not found to be a 'liar or a cheat'. They will speak with the three of us individually, then my wife and I and then the three of us together."

"Okay, that sounds great coach."

"Oh, and Malcom, because our backgrounds are clean, we can petition the court at the same time to have you placed temporarily in our custody as a foster child."

"Are you kidding" he exclaimed in joy.

The next few weeks were spent painting and decorating Malcom's room. I held my nose as he pasted his Georgia football poster on his wall. I realized then I had a lot of work to do to convert this young stallion to my way of thinking.

The first thing that we did was go shopping for clothes. Malcom was allocated money for two new pairs of shoes and a few changes of clothes a year. In all that time he did not remember having a real pair of pajamas. Sonja complained that this boy needed a new pair of shoes every few months. He grew two inches before his seventeenth birthday and two more his senior year. He towered over both Cade and I and often joked that he could pick Sonja up and dunk her like a basketball.

It was the little things that kept us surprised. No one had ever taken care of his ethnic hair. I think he was embarrassed at first when Sonja took him into town to an African American beauty shop. The owner took a look at his hair and showed him to properly take care of it. After that I took him a barber shop to teach him to care for his facial hair and get a routine haircut. It was an educational experience for me because I had no idea how his curly hair tended to cause more hair bumps than my own beard. One of the workers in the shop teased him about looking the old movie star Jason Momoa and that he would have to soon beat the girls off with a stick.

Being with us also improved his physical fitness. He ate smarter. He could soon also bench press his weight. Sonja decided to go back and pick up some hours at grad school forcing him to sit down with her at the 'study table'. Any guest in the house also had to bring books from the classroom or a library until 9 p.m.

While the guys like to park their butts in front of the gaming systems, Sonja stocked up on board games and playing cards forcing interaction between all the guests. The pool table and ping pong table were a source of constant conflict. There was a time that I thought about putting them away until Sonja finally ferreted out the two trouble makers and banned them for a semester from the house.

By the time the bedroom was finished, we had filed the petition to adopt and got a court order placing Malcom in our custody. Six months and one day later we went to court to finalize the adoption. Malcom's new birth certificate arrived two weeks later. Armed with the birth certificate, we went to the social security office as a family and got him a new social security card with the name Malcom Charles King LaSalle.

Having a teenager in the household was interesting and life changing. The house was rarely quiet. Either the second TV was on or the basement was full of teenagers. While we made a number of new family traditions, my favorite was to hold an open house every fall just after the first football game. We invited some of Malcom's friends and their parents over. I asked Malcom to help Sonja and I identify other teens like him that were either on the fringes or in need of a good friend.

We invited both the police chief and sheriff over in their civilian clothes. Sonja and each of the two officers made sure to isolate every young woman who was present and convey that they were there for them with anything that they might need. After a game of volleyball or basketball scrimmage, one of the officers would address everyone together about drag racing, driving while drunk, bullying, parental abuse, sexual harassment and sexual assault. I made it clear that while they were welcomed in our home, drugs and alcohol were not allowed at any time and that pool safety was always a priority.

Out of our event came the idea for the buddy bench at the high school. Atleast one student leader sat on the buddy bench each day before school and at lunch time. Any student wanting/needing a friend was welcomed to sit on the bench and be welcomed by the other students sitting there. It was very popular and the faculty members wondered why they didn't think of it first.

We added a small weight set in the basement for Malcom and Sonja to use during the off season. My son and I made good use of the trails that Cade and I had walked out decades before. I thought him how to safely hunt. We had great fun building new hunting blinds together up on the hill tops and near the creek. Sonja never took to any of the animals that we caught and frowned her nose up even at the smell of the game while I was cooking it.

I was old and Malcom was also too old to change his stripes. It broke my heart when he signed a letter of intent to play at Georgia. Now being over 6 feet tall, he clung to being a tight end in college. Lucky for him that like the former pro basketball player Dennis Rodman, he grew three more inches his freshman year at Georgia. Redshirted his freshman year, he was able learn to work with the new found height and those big feet to become a premier player for the team. Running up the hills on the farm made him focus on his footwork to insure that he didn't step into some pot hole and helped him to keep his balance while accelerating up a hill. That skill served him well as he ducked and dodged defensive players while skirting the sidelines on a long distance run up the sideline.

While others talked about him declaring for the draft his junior year, he said "dad, the ball games are fun but I'm tired of getting hit all the time. I know that momma wants me out the game. She doesn't want me hurt and I have to admit that I have been concerned at seeing what is happening to some of the players after more time in the pros. I was talking to Coach Walker the other day and he asked about me to consider coming back to coach the receivers as a graduate assistant and stay on to teach Mathematics."

After graduation Malcom asked if he could move into momma's old house. The three of use spent many hours repairing and painting it. He wasn't there that often anyway as a young stud, but I heard that he thought he needed to stay close for a while since we were starting to get up there in years.

He married his college sweet heart and they had a child in the first year of their marriage. Sonja became a fixture on the other side of the property when they were in Alabama. I'm not sure why Olivia didn't tell her to get out. I finally realized that they had created a bond of their own. Olivia's mother died suddenly her junior year in college. Sonja reached out to comfort her. Sonja amazed me at how she continually kept her mother's memory alive without any hint of jealousy. In fact it was Sonja who suggested that they add the name Grace to their short list of names for a girl. Grace was joined by twin brothers three years later. The boys were as different as night and day.

I returned late one Saturday morning to pick up Sonja to go meet Malcom and his kids for Grace's tenth birthday. He had brought the kids back to see the deer and visit a couple of his old high school buddies. "Come on 'City Mouse' get a move on it"! I finally walked into the front room and saw Sonja sitting quietly in her big chair. "Sonja come on they're waiting for us." There was no movement and my heart was suddenly filled with fear. My Sonja was gone I realized as I fell to my knees never wanting to get up again myself. How could I live without her? How could I have been so stupid to have wasted all those years apart from her? It was Malcom who found us with me too paralyzed to move from the floor. This time it was me weeping in the arms of my boy as we mourned her loss together.


End file.
